PAIN | PATENTIENCE | DEPRESSION
MY JOURNEY
This is to bring awareness to everyone who doesnt know what its like going through breast cancer. All surgeries are different for every woman and man that goes through this. But this is what I experienced.
Breast Cancer
ITS A BATTLE I DIDNT THINK I COULD MENTALLY MANAGE.
Mentally people wont tell you how draining it is to not only lose part of you, but have infections, sever pain, and botched surgery in the process..
My body from this surgery looks horrible. I live with looking in the mirror every day seeing indents in my body from over lipo, implants not being put in properly causing droopage, indents, and sever warping. Mentally this surgery is horrible.
THIS IS THE BEGINING
FRESH OUT FROM SURGERY
Honestly.. this was the hardest thing I have ever gone through in my life. Now I have gone through some incredibly traumatizing rough things in my life. Let talk about the Pain after waking up.
Being strapped down to the table in a cross position for 12 hours being filled with air, once you wake up there is honestly no pain meds that can touch that type of pain. Moving your arms is unbearable. Being told you need to stand up and start walking to re leave the air in your chest, but every movement you make tightens every muscle that has been cut apart or removed from your body. Having a Double Mastectomy feel like you are in a horrible horror movie forcing you to cause pain to yourself to get out of a horrible situation.
Laying down causes chess pains, attempting to sit up is risking you ripping your incisions. the nerve blockers they put in help, but not enough. Begging for more pain meds after your are already maxed out, and crying for help. Second guessing if going through with this surgery was worth all the pain you are dealing with. Numbness in your hands, where holding things are nearly impossible.
These are things they do not tell you about. it took me 2 months to re learn how to use my hands again. This is my journey, my battles, my pain med intake and all the support i have received during and after my Breast Cancer surgery.
RECOVERY | COMPLICATIONS
I cannot stress enough how painful this was.. Once I went through the healing process it took me almost a YEAR to be able to lift a Gallon of milk again without causing massive pain in my chest. Now you may know someone who had Breast Cancer surgery and bounced back quick. I sadly did not.. This pain has dragged out for ever. Fast forward to this year 2022, and im still in pain.
One thing I wish I could go back and change, is getting the Implants. Getting them was the biggest Mistake I could have made. Why did I choose to implants? Well mentally I thought that I would have sever body dysmorphia, little did I know that since having these shitty implants that I swear are making me sick, they are more of a hassle than anything.
If you are going through breast cancer and are expected to have a surgery in the future, here are a few things you SHOULD have on stand by for recovery. Find a hairstylist that can braid your hair for a few weeks after surgery. buy a chair you will not be sleeping laying down for a few weeks. Mastectomy shirts are needed to hold all four of your drains do not bother pinning them to your shirt just live in the mastectomy shirt you will love it! Finally have a support team. You will be naked in front of people to shower, you will cry all the time, you need someone to regulate your meds or you will wake up at 3am screaming in pain.
Future Surgery Plans